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Hey, Teddy, you got a spring in your step today! Oh, no, wait, you look depressed.

"Bobby Driver" is the sixth episode in Season 9, being the one-hundred-and-fifty-sixth episode overall.


Bob agrees to drive professional quilter Edith around town, after she convinces him to join in a plot for revenge. Meanwhile, the kids attend a lavish "Gatsby"-themed birthday party, and Linda helps Teddy expand his taste palate.

Full story[]

Bob takes the kids to Goods Mart, to buy a toy as a gift for a birthday party they are attending and are already late for. The boy, Colton, is not in any of their grades, and Louise suspects he’s just padding out the invites for the party to get gifts. Tina denies this and Bob agrees with her, saying to give people a chance as they may surprise you. After picking out an off-brand Rubik’s cube, the family see Edith harassing a customer over the cost of batteries, thinking he is an employee. Bob rushes the kids away to avoid her, and says that his line about people does not apply to Edith, who he says is always awful.

Bob drops the kids at Colton’s house, where a large Great Gatsby-1920s-themed party is going on, which Bob notes is an odd choice for a kid’s party, while Colton’s parents, Blake and Allison, give the kids period-appropriate hats and feather bands. Colton is apprehensive and just wants to open his presents, but instead is made to take a photo with the Belchers (while keeping his finger up his nose). Bob hastily leaves for the restaurant.

At the restaurant, Linda notices that Teddy is depressed, who explains that he has a second date with a woman named Caroline, but it’s at a sushi restaurant, which she loves but he hates. But he lied and said he loves it, and now has to eat it there; after yelling Mort’s suggestion of eating chicken teriyaki, Linda suggests that she can teach him to like sushi. Even though the date is that night, Teddy agrees, and they order sushi.

On the drive back, Bob notices Edith walking on the sidewalk, struggling with carrying her shopping bags. After seeing her drop a bag, he sighs and offers her a ride. She accepts the ride after figuring it could be helpful. In the car, Bob asks about her walking, and she explains that she cannot drive due to bad “fits” and gives him a pill bottle, telling him to put one in her hand when she has one. Edith guilts Bob into making another stop as a favor.

At the party, the kids try to learn the Charleston while Colton’s parents take pictures, with Louise dismissing Colton standing off to the side picking his nose while Tina continues to insist on giving him a chance. Louise plots to take back their present, feeling Colton doesn’t deserve it with all the other presents.

Bob is parked outside a house when Edith walks out faster than usual and gets in the car, telling Bob to drive off fast. Edith is holding a quilt piece she stole from Eleanor Hirschbaum, a member of her quilting circle; the group are making a quilt on the town’s history, but Lillian, the leader, rejected Edith’s square due to believing the subject matter inappropriate. When Edith argued with her, Lillian kicked her out of the group; as such, with the quilt to be assembled and displayed at the Wharf Arts Center later that day, Edith is planning to steal the squares and assemble it herself. Bob asks why she dragged him into this, and she explains that she was going to do this all on foot, but when he offered her a ride, she figured he was faster and nothing to lose. Bob notes that he could lose his family and restaurant, and pulls over to drop her off. However, Edith soon has a choking “fit”, and only agrees to swallow her pill if Bob helps her steal the other quilt squares. Bob reluctantly agrees.

Bob drives Edith to her next stop, Philip Frond’s house. Bob is shocked but stays to leave the engine running while Edith goes inside. She fake-apologizes about what happened with the group and compliments his living room full of crafts he made. She distracts him to another room by asking to see more of his needlepoints, which he leaves to get, while she looks through the place for the square.

At the restaurant, Teddy is unsure about the “stuff” that comes with the sushi, while Linda answers the phone. It is Bob, who explains he is helping Edith run her quilt errand around town, before being distracted by Teddy screaming in the background (due to eating large amounts of wasabi, thinking it is guacamole). Linda hangs up to help, while Edith runs to the car with Frond’s square and the two take off. Edith dismisses Frond’s square and mentions her “freaks” before changing the subject when Bob asks.

At the party, it is badminton time, and then presents. Gene takes off his shoes to air his socks, soggy from dancing, when Louise gets an idea: in addition not taking their present back, they put Gene’s smelly socks in the gift bag, to Tina’s horror and who asks for time to talk to Colton. Louise gives her until present unwarping time to talk and see fi Colton is not as bad as Louise thinks. Tina goes to talk to Colton, but is interrupted by the beginning of badminton.

Bob and Edith drive all over town, stealing quilt squares and bonding, while Linda tries teaching teddy to eat sushi by hiding it in a burger. The duo drive to the Elegant Doily, where Bob waits while Edith goes inside.

At the party, the kids are all playing croquet. Louise feels Colton’s parents are working hard while taking photos and he is giving them nothing. Tina fails to tap her ball towards Colton, and Louise says they some people are as bad as one thinks they are when it is present-opening time. While Blake takes “pre-present portraits”, Louise sneaks the socks to the gift table, but is caught by Colton. However, he finds the prank idea hilarious, as it would upset his parents, whose idea it was for the party and being perfectionists about it, while he just wanted a pizza party for himself, but his father told him it would not look good on social media. Louise notes that he seemed excited about the presents ,but he says that it’s because then everyone will go home. Louise notes distaste as the parents take more photos on their phones for hashtags.

Outside the retirement home, an orderly comes out to tell Bob Edith is having a fit. Bob runs inside and give Edith another pill, but she tells him to go to Lillian’s room and take the quilt square out of a dresser drawer, to his reluctance. He runs to the room and gets the square, but is caught by Lillian right as he sees a picture of her and Sergeant Bosco. Edith and Bob are stopped by her, who had been warned by the other quilters and is waiting for her son to arrive and arrest them, btu the two manage to escape in time.

Bob is horrified while Edith tells him to drive her to the art supply store. At the Doily, Bosco is exasperated at his mother calling him out to find a missing quilt square, but agrees to look into it, while she goes along with him.

At the party, Colton is holding up presents for his parent’s pictures, while Louise thinks there has to be something they can do for him.

At Reflections, Harold gets in with supplies and Edith tells Bob to drive to the Wharf Arts Center as the ceremony starts in 20 minutes, to Bob’s exasperation. On the way, Harold in putting together the quilt, and Edith tells Bob that this is Phase 2: putting together the quilt her way. Edith accidentally frats out loud, and Harold tells her to take a gas pill, which Bob realizes is what he’s been handing her. He realizes she doesn’t get “fits” and asks if it is true she’s not allowed to drive, and she admits that their car is just in the shop. Bob is angry at being tricked and possibly getting in trouble, with his wife probably worried sick about him. (Meanwhile, Linda is only focused on getting Teddy to take another bite of sushi.)

Bob pulls over and makes them get out of the car. As the couple hold the quilt off the ground, Bob notices Edith’s square and asks what is on it. She explains that it is decorated with members of the freak show which used to be at Wonder Wharf years ago, including “Two Faced Tommy”, “Howie the pinhead’, “Bearded Becky”, “Tattooed Larry”, “Pumpkinhead Gary”, “Righty the Left-Hander”, a man with long nipples, and a little girl, who is Edith herself. Her parents worked on the Wharf and the freaks would look after her, but Lillian thinks they do not belong on the town’s history quilt. Bob finds it sweet, and rather than let them take the bus, tells them to get back in the car so he can give them a ride to the arts ceremony.

Bob agrees to take the long way as Harold needs time to sew up the quilt, but is worried Bosco is looking for them. Meanwhile, Bosco finds the art store closed and prepares to give up, but Lillian figures out that Edith will be at the art center and calls the other quilters to meet them there.

At the party, the parents have everyone gather around for photos with the last present, when Colton again puts his finger up his nose, and Louise decides to help him by putting her own finger in her nose and encouraging other kids, including her siblings, to pick their own noses to ruin the photos. The Belcher kids are taken inside the house with Blake and Allison being angry at them for ruining Colton’s party, but Colton outright tells them it’s not his party, it’s theirs. Tina tries to be diplomatic, while Louise says that Colton is saying the party is a big photo op, and the parents start breaking down admitting it is true; their coworker’s families have beautiful and lively photo feeds they are envious of. They agree to one last present opening without any phones to take photos (although they do take pictures of the insides of their coat pockets out of compulsion).

At the Wharf Arts Center, Bob, Edith and Harold arrive with the quilt, only to see the Boscos arrive and run inside, only to then find the quilter’s circle waiting for them. The director of exhibitions interrupts them, saying the sewing ceremony for the town history quilt is about to start and ask if it is still happening. Lillian arrives and says it is happening without Edith, but Edith refuses to hand over the quilt. Bob steps in and tells them that while Edith did take the quilt squares and can be difficult to be around, and the freaks may not be “pretty”, but they were good people and sometimes we judge people based on what one thinks they know about them but it is wrong. He shows them the quilt with Edith’s square, and they are impressed by the work, and agree to give the quilt with the freaks square on it to the Wharf Arts Center. Lillian objects, and Bosco takes Bob aside to say his mother is riled up. Bob, Edith and Harold agree to pretend to be arrested by Bosco for his mother.

That night at the Belcher home, the family is having dinner and Bob admits that the whole day with Edith was great, while Louise may start nose picking. Linda says that she “kind of taught” teddy to not hate sushi. At the sushi place, Teddy is on the date, and secretly flicks some of it away onto another customer before mistaking a serving of wasabi for guacamole again.


External links[]

Episode Navigation vte
Season Episodes
The Demo
1 Human FleshCrawl SpaceSacred CowSexy Dance FightingHamburger Dinner TheaterSheesh! Cab, Bob?Bed & BreakfastArt CrawlSpaghetti Western and MeatballsBurger WarWeekend at Mort'sLobsterfestTorpedo
2 The BelchiesBob Day AfternoonSynchronized SwimmingBurgerbossFood Truckin'Dr. YapMoody FoodieBad TinaBeefsquatch
3 Ear-sy RiderFull BarsBob Fires the KidsMutiny on the WindbreakerAn Indecent Thanksgiving ProposalThe DeepeningTinarannosaurus WrecksThe Unbearable Like-Likeness of GeneGod Rest Ye Merry Gentle-MannequinsMother Daughter Laser RazorNude BeachBroadcast Wagstaff School NewsMy Fuzzy ValentineLindapendent WomanO.T. The Outside ToiletTopsyTwo for TinaIt Snakes a VillageFamily FracasThe Kids Run the RestaurantBoyz 4 NowCarpe MuseumThe Unnatural
4 A River Runs Through BobFort NightSeaplane!My Big Fat Greek BobTurkey in a CanPurple Rain-UnionBob and DeliverChristmas in the CarSlumber PartyPresto Tina-oEasy Com-mercial, Easy Go-mercialThe Frond FilesMazel TinaUncle TeddyThe Kids Rob a TrainI Get Psy-chic Out of YouThe EquestranautsAmbergrisThe Kids Run AwayGene It OnWharf HorseWorld Wharf II: The Wharfening
5 Work Hard or Die Trying, GirlTina and the Real GhostFriends with Burger-fitsDawn of the PeckBest BurgerFather of the BobTina Tailor Soldier SpyMidday RunSpeakeasy RiderLate Afternoon in the Garden of Bob and LouiseCan't Buy Me MathThe Millie-churian CandidateThe Gayle TalesLi'l Hard DadAdventures in Chinchilla-sittingThe Runway ClubThe Itty Bitty Ditty CommitteeEat, Spray, LindaHousetrapHawk & ChickThe Oeder Games
6 Sliding BobsThe Land ShipThe HaunteningGayle Makin' Bob SledNice-CapadesThe Cook, the Steve, the Gayle, & Her LoverThe Gene & Courtney ShowSexy Dance HealingSacred CouchLice Things Are LiceHouse of 1000 BouncesStand by GeneWag the HogThe Hormone-iumsPro Tiki/Con TikiBye Bye Boo BooThe Horse Rider-erSecret Admiral-irerGlued, Where's My Bob?
7 Flu-ouiseSea Me NowTeen-a WitchThey Serve Horses, Don't They?Large Brother, Where Fart Thou?The Quirk-ducersThe Last Gingerbread House on the LeftEx MachTinaBob ActuallyThere's No Business Like Mr. Business BusinessA Few 'Gurt MenLike Gene for ChocolateThe Grand Mama-pest HotelAquaticismAin't Miss Debatin'Eggs for DaysZero Larp ThirtyThe Laser-inthThelma & Louise Except Thelma is LindaMom, Lies, and VideotapeParaders of the Lost FloatInto the Mild
8 BrunchsquatchThe Silence of the LouiseThe Wolf of Wharf StreetSit Me Baby One More TimeThanks-hoardingThe BleakeningV for Valentine-dettaY Tu Ga-Ga TambienThe Secret Ceramics Room of SecretsSleeping with the FrenemyThe Hurt SoccerCheer Up, Sleepy GeneThe Trouble with DoublesGo Tina on the MountainAre You There Bob? It's Me, BirthdayBoywatchAs I Walk Through the Alley of the Shadow of RampsMo Mommy Mo ProblemsMission Impos-slug-bleSomething Old, Something New, Something Bob Caters for You
9 Just One of the Boyz 4 Now for NowThe Taking of Funtime One Two ThreeTweentrepreneursNightmare on Ocean Avenue StreetLive and Let FlyBobby DriverI Bob Your PardonRoller? I Hardly Know Her!UFO No You Didn'tBetter Off SledLorenzo's Oil? No, Linda'sThe Helen HuntBed, Bob & BeyondEvery Which Way but GooseThe Fresh Princ-ipalRoamin' Bob-idayWhat About Blob?If You Love It So Much, Why Don't You Marionette?Long Time Listener, First Time BobThe Gene MileP.T.A. It Ain't SoYes Without My Zeke
10 The Ring (But Not Scary)Boys Just Wanna Have FungusMotor, She BoatPig Trouble in Little TinaLegends of the MallThe Hawkening: Look Who's Hawking Now!Land of the LoftNow We're Not Cooking with GasAll That GeneHave Yourself a Maily Linda ChristmasDrumforgivenA Fish Called TinaThree Girls and a Little WharfyWag the SongYurty Rotten ScoundrelsFlat-Top o' the Morning to YaJust the TripTappy Tappy Tappy Tap Tap TapThe Handyman CanPoops!… I Didn't Do It AgainLocal She-roPrank You for Being a Friend
11 Dream a Little Bob of BobWorms of In-Rear-mentCopa-Bob-banaHeartbreak Hotel-oweenFast Time Capsules at Wagstaff SchoolBob Belcher and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad KidsDiarrhea of a Poopy KidThe Terminalator II: Terminals of EndearmentMommy BoyYachty or NiceRomancing the BeefDie Card, or Card TryingAn Incon-Wheelie-ent TruthMr. Lonely FartsSheshank RedumptionY Tu Tina TambiénFingers-looseSome Kind of Fender BenderfulBridge Over Troubled RudySteal Magazine-oliasTell Me Dumb Thing GoodVampire Disco Death Dance
12 Manic Pixie Crap ShowCrystal MessThe PumpkineningDriving Big DummySeven-tween AgainBeach, PleaseLoft in BedslationStuck in the Kitchen with YouFOMO You Didn'tGene's Christmas BreakTouch of Eval(uations)Ferry on My Wayward Bob and LindaFrigate Me KnotVideo Killed the Gene-io StarAncient Misbehavin'Interview with a Pop-pop-pireThe Spider House RulesClear and Present GingerA-Sprout a BoySauce Side StorySome Like It Bot Part 1: Eighth Grade RunnerSome Like It Bot Part 2: Judge-bot Day
13 To Bob, or Not to BobThe Reeky Lake ShowWhat About Job?Comet-y of ErrorsSo You Stink You Can DanceApple Gore-chard! (But Not Gory)Ready Player GenePutts-givingShow Mama from the GraveThe Plight Before ChristmasCheaty Cheaty Bang BangOh Row You Didn'tStop! Or My Mom Will Sleuth!These Boots Are Made for StalkingThe Show (and Tell) Must Go OnWhat a (April) Fool BelievesCrows Encounters of the Bird KindGift Card or Buy TryingCrab-solutely FabulousRadio No You Didn'tMother Author Laser PointerAmelia
14 Fight at the Not Okay Chore-ralThe Amazing RudyThe PickleoretteRunning Down a GeneBully-ieve It or NotEscape from Which Island?The (Raccoon) King and IWharf, Me Worry?Fraud of the Dead: Zombie-docu-pocalypseThe Nightmare 2 Days Before ChristmasMission Impossi-BobJade in the ShadeButt Sweat and Fears
15 TBA
Unknown season (order subject to change) The Big StieblitzkiThe Tina Table: The Tables Have Tina-edThe Right Tough StuffTo Catch a BeefDon't Stop Be-cheesin'For Whom the Doll ToesThey Slug Horses, Don't They?Hope N' Mic NightBoogie DaysDog Christmas Day After AfternoonAdvice Things Are Ad-NiceMr. Fischoeder's OpusLike a Candle in the GymSnackfaceThe Place Beyond the PineconesThe Lost City of AtlanticInsomnibobWild Steal-ionsThe Shell GameThe Dead Bo-ats SocietyDad-urday Kite FeverMr. Safebody
See also: Episode Guide