Quotes[]
Common[]
- “Oh, boo.”
- — Common phrase
- “Is that what you said when you met Mom?”
- — to Bob Belcher, Common phrase
- “Brag.”
- — Common phrase
- “[insert name], give me strength!”
- — Common phrase
Bob's Burgers[]
Season 1[]
- “Well, I have a room to re-fart.”
- — "Crawl Space"
- “A fart is like a fingerprint, and we have the same fingerprints!”
- — about Bob Belcher, "Spaghetti Western and Meatballs"
- “Come on, boys. You're the peanut butter. Girls, you're the jelly. LET'S MAKE SOME SAMMICHES!!!”
Season 2[]
- “Let's find butt treasure!”
- “I can't take all the credit! I'd like to thank this brick and Questlove.”
- — "The Belchies"
- “AHHH! ANTHRAX! ANTRHAX SMELLS LIKE BABIES!”
- “Next time we do this I'm getting an epidural!”
- “Was it obvious I don't care?”
- — about Bob Belcher, "Burgerboss"
- “We're selling out! Yeah!”
- — "Food Truckin'"
- “I'm lying to myself. I do not look good in shorts.”
- — "Food Truckin'"
- “Do you need a diversion? I'll scream. COCKROACH!!!”
- — to Bob Belcher, "Moody Foodie"
- “Come on! If you're going to be loud, you've gotta be proud!”
- — about Tammy Larsen, "Bad Tina"
- “No one blackmails our sister but us!”
- — about Tina Belcher, "Bad Tina"
- “We're Belchers, from the womb to the tomb!”
- — "Bad Tina"
- “As long as we're giving orders, put some clothes on! Leave something to the imagination, for God's sake!”
- — to Bob Belcher, "Beefsquatch"
Season 3[]
- “I’m gonna write a eulogy. I knew you so briefly you dead soap dog.”
- “ABANDON SHIP! For Bob's Burgers!”
- “If it's that one, it's hilarious. If it's that one, it's dead...which isn't funny.”
- “My life is more difficult than anyone else's on the planet. And yes, I'm including starving children, so don't ask!”
- “Yay, scrotal wax!”
- “I was BORN to be a mother!”
- “Okay, here's a funny story. You cannot sing.”
- — to Tina Belcher, "Topsy"
- “I call Henry Kissinger to the stand!”
- — "Family Fracas"
- “I'm just a girl with a dream who got tired of hearing the word no!”
Season 4[]
- “Yeah, let's get our tubes tied!”
- “Dad's not a fighter. He's a yeller-an Old Yeller.”
- — "Seaplane!"
- “You can't wear white. You're not a virgin.”
- — to Bob Belcher, "Bob and Deliver"
- “I think I have the best legs in the family, and the smoothest bottom.”
- “Please stop talking. You're ruining the shopping montage.”
- — to Harley, "Slumber Party"
- “I'm already addicted to fame! And carbs.”
- “Small bits of pork throughout the day is what they say!”
- — in Louise Belcher's story, "The Frond Files"
- “Now can I get circumcised?”
- — "Mazel-Tina"
- “Dad, I never realized how soulful your eyes are.”
- — "Mazel Tina"
- “Why would I be horny? I'm not an antelope.”
Season 5[]
- “Lord Santa, strike him down!”
- — about Bob Belcher, "Father of the Bob"
- “You can't hurt me, Tina. At this point, I'm more bean than Gene.”
- — to Tina Belcher, "Father of the Bob"
- “Hey, everybody! I'm covered in bean juice! How about I run around and you all try to catch me like a pig at the state fair?”
- “JUST LET ME INTO YOUR WORLD!”
- “I'm like the Steve Jobs of sitting on the couch for three days.”
- — "The Runway Club"
- “Yeah, but isn't bacteria just a myth?”
- — to Coach Blevins, "The Runway Club"
Season 6[]
- “A world without a Gene is not a world I want to live in.”
- — "Sliding Bobs"
- “So, Mr. Frond, is it true that you've got a MONKEY BUTT?!”
- “(gasps) Beyoncé?”
- “Show us your butt!”
- — "Stand by Gene"
- “I like throwing up on people. I mean I don't love it, but I'll do it.”
- — "Bye Bye Boo Boo"
- “I'm on a cheese cleanse—physically and spiritually!”
- — to Louise Belcher, "Glued, Where's My Bob?"
Season 7[]
- “Dare Dad to kiss Teddy!”
- “Dad, you need a Venetian mask and a thong, stat!”
- “It's like circumcision for your whole body except your penis.”
- — "Aquaticism"
- “I can talk myself into anything. I like salad now!”
- “Yeah, some old guy made a Swiss roll that made me feel something, for once.”
- — "Boywatch"
- “(gasps) That little Amish boy!”
- — "Into the Mild"
- “Aren't we all Delta Burke?”
- — "Into the Mild"
Season 8[]
- “Apparently, we're going to hide a man in our basement?”
- “You rang?”
- — to Bob Belcher, "Brunchsquatch"
- “Shanky-panky!”
- “Just the tip.”
- “Protect us, Lord Santa!”
- “Dad's about to get horny.”
- “It's not my fault I'm a genius!”
- — to Louise Belcher, "Y Tu Ga-Ga Tambien"
- “Yeah, well, Whoopi Goldberg wasn't a nun until she had to go into witness protection, and she turned that choir around.”
- “Dad has resting 'B' face.”
- “Mess with the Belchers, and you will be mildly inconvenienced!”
- — "Boywatch"
- “Which one of us is the pickle man's child?”
- “Aah! I won't take sides! I'm like a sexy Switzerland.”
- “Hmm. Looks like we're sleeping on the couch.”
- “Are we talking streaking? Shall I disrobe?”
- “Bros before hose.”
- “Looks like Frankie's going to Hollywood.”
Season 9[]
- “Your nipples must be a mess!”
- “You're a thirsty bitch.”
- “I don't know, that still sounds like a lot of ass.”
- — "Tweentrepreneurs"
- “You flew too close to the Sun Chips.”
- — to Tina Belcher, "Tweentrepreneurs"
- “That's okay, I'm used to eyes on my butt.”
- — "Tweentrepreneurs"
- “Yeah, the only Parton I need to see is Dolly!”
- “Go for it, sister—I don't see a ring.”
- — to Tina Belcher, "I Bob Your Pardon"
- “A mayor's taint is sacred!”
- “Let me at those nips!”
- — to Bob Belcher, "I Bob Your Pardon"
- “Open up, tenant. We need to search your holes!”
- — "The Helen Hunt"
- “Eatin' brains and doin' cocaine!”
- “I'm not ready for this! I'm just a boy!”
- “We had a spelling test, and I think I did B-A-D-D.”
- — "Roamin' Bob-iday"
- “'The Tech Booth With Dot'? I hate that podcast.”
- “That's easy. Fart, pudding, ding-dong, done.”
- “Ow, my boob.”
- “I'm Gene, the boy with the golden voice—and golden ding-dong.”
Season 10[]
- “I'm Daddy's little piggy.”
- “Time to eat some nougat and then make some nuggets.”
- “Sorry, Billy Joel, we did start the fire!”
- “Woodstock? Nice try, hippie, it's over.”
- “DAAMN, girl! That pad thai smells yum-my!”
- — "All That Gene"
- “If God wanted us to listen to audio books, she wouldn't have given us eyes to watch TV.”
- “Because, Father, it's Pajama Day at school, and I'm wearing what I slept in last night, which is nothing.”
- “There's only enough prosciutto for one. I'll eat the prosciutto, and then you eat me.”
- “I don't want to toot own horn, but... (farts)”
- “I understand. I still have Mom's bras on.”
Season 11[]
- “It's hard out here for a crimp.”
- “Father, feed me that turkey!”
- “I'm not eating my secret brisket snack!”
- — to Linda Belcher, "Mommy Boy"
- “The future is female.”
- — to Linda Belcher, "Mommy Boy"
- “Lemons are for the water, cucumbers are for the eyes. And salt and vinegar chips are for the mouth.”
- — to Bob Belcher, "Mommy Boy"
- “Compromised!”
- — "Mommy Boy"
- “You're not my mother right now.”
- “My wiener's out.”
- “Raw pube power is what got us to the moon.”
Season 12[]
- “Whoa. Is that a magical flying sеx worker convention?”
- “Is 'sparkle sprinkles' drugs?”
- “I remember when I could twirl. Then time caught up with me. Now I get dizzy looking at a rotisserie chicken.”
- “Grandpa was looking for a good spot to pitch a tent.”
- “Flies usually land on me, eventually.”
- “It's Sprite and chicken time, baby!”
- — "Sauce Side Story"
- “WALL-E is more human than all of you!”
Season 13[]
- “Aah! I just smelled the smell of a thousand dead poops!”
- “Personally, I love getting whatever I want.”
- “Love is love.”
Season 14[]
- “Ugh! My subconscious is a total b-hole!”
- “Don't make this about religion.”
- “I think I'm just gonna go in my room and moan in private.”
- “It's like your journal, but you're just saying it out loud.”
- — to Tina Belcher, "Mission Impossi-Bob"
Other media[]
- “I wore that bucket on my head for a while. Any fun stories about that?”