Bob notices that he has started to lose his hair. In a wave of nostalgia, Linda reminisces about Bob’s mustache and how it made her fall for him years ago. Meanwhile, the kids tell their own versions of what would have happened if Bob didn't have his mustache when met Linda.
Plot[]
Bob is working out on a stationary bike, but later, while taking a shower, Bob notices that he’s losing hair in his mustache. The discussion of his facial hair leads Linda to tell the story of how she and Bob met: when she was engaged to Hugo, she was at a bar with her friend Ginger and her ring got stuck in Bob’s mustache. The encounter led to her leaving Hugo for Bob. With the possibly of Bob losing his mustache, Tina, Gene, and Louise speculate about what would have happened if Bob hadn’t had his mustache when he met Linda. With Tina stating that Bob and Linda would still end up together because of fate.
Gene's version[]
Bob and Linda are at the bar, and Linda accidentally hits Bob on his lip and without his mustache, he's no good and he starts bleeding. When he is at the hospital, Sergeant Bosco comes in and makes Bob faint, again. Bob wakes up having no memory of what happened at all. He was given a robotic mustache to search for crime as Robo-Stache. While he is, he meets Linda on the streets singing something about Hugo. When Linda and Bob try to kiss, Bob's mustache electrocutes him and shocks his memory. Remembering what happened when they met, he and Linda go to the police stain to confront Bosco. Bosco reveals that Bob was programmed to be nitpick about laws to force people to move out, so that Mr. Fischoeder, who owns the cops, can turn the area into "Wonder Wharf-opolis", an amusement park town. Bob moves to arrest Bosco, but the secret protocol programmed into him activates, that he can never rebel against Bosco. However, Bosco unmasks himself to actually be Mr. Fischoeder; without the Bosco disguise, Bob can now arrest him, so Fischoeder uses his cybernetic eye and fights Bob until finally Bob is wounded and dies, with Linda taking his mustache.
Louise's version[]
When Bob and Linda meet in the bar, it’s love at first sight for Bob, but wholly unrequited by Linda as she tells him he needs to grow a mustache to win her heart. Determined to win Linda, Bob tries to grow a mustache. After failing to do so, Bob asks an automated carnival attraction, The Swami, for a mustache, only it is broken so he asks the handyman fixing it (dy)Ted. Instead, he develops uncontrollable hair growth and is forced to become a freak show act at the Wonder Wharf, while Linda becomes a nun, gets kicked out because she was mistaken in thinking it would be like the movie Sister Act, and goes to jail.
Tina's version[]
Ron and Bob in Tina's story.
Tina tries to make her parents end up together but none of her versions work. Tina accepts that if Bob's hadn't had his mustache, Linda would not have canceled her engagement to Hugo and she would have married him. And they have three children, Mona (Tina's counterpart who hates boys and zombies), Dean (Gene's counterpart, who is quiet and doesn't like attention), and Charlene (Louise's counterpart who wears a princess outfit). And because Hugo never suffers heartbreak from Linda breaking up with him, he's much more chipper and has opened a restaurant: Hugo's Hot Dogs. Linda however is unhappy and barely hides it. On one weekend on May 5 (Hugo and Linda's anniversary), the family meet the health inspectors who show up: Ron, and Bob, who due to having a failed string of restaurant ventures, is now a high-strung mustache-less health inspector. The two meet the family, with Bob and Linda recognizing each other, but Bob says they are there due to a rumor that the hot dogs are made with real Weiner dog meat. Although dismissing t at first, Hugo blurts out that it is true, and that he gets the meat from a highly regarded pet mortuary. Facing a shutdown, Linda tries to convince Bob, and compliments him when he has a milkshake mustache, but the restaurant is still facing closure.
Epilogue[]
The rest of the Belchers note how Tina went so dark, and she has a panic attack about how random things are, but Linda manages to clam her down and point out that After Gene sits on the exercise bike and experiences pain in his crotch, Bob realizes that the bike was responsible for him losing his hair, due to damage to his testicles from riding it constantly (and not noticing due to feeling pain all over). Meanwhile, as Ron and Hugo are having lunch, Ron asked Hugo what would it been like if they never met, causing Hugo to yell screaming as Ron asked this question before.
