|Bob's Burgers character|
|Occupation||Contractor, Handyman, Carpenter, Hockey Player|
|Relatives|| Denise (ex-wife)|
|Behind the scenes|
|Voiced by||Larry Murphy|
|“||So it's not me then?||”|
Theodore "Teddy" is a carpenter, handyman, and Bob's best friend. He is a frequent diner at the restaurant.
Teddy is a burly man in his 40s (The Wolf of Wharf Street). He has tan skin and is bald and has 5 o'clock shadow and wears a blue button-down with rolled up sleeves, a white T-shirt underneath and brown cargo pants. In one episode, he is seen wearing a customised work jumpsuit. He stands at 6'1", but due to his bad posture, he makes himself about 5'11".
When he was young, Teddy was muscular, handsome, and had long blond hair (The Deepening). He let himself go after a woman turned him down; his condition has not improved since his divorce.
Teddy's shoe sizes are a size 13 on the left foot and an 11 on the right. ("The Secret Ceramics Room of Secrets")
While kind-hearted as well as a loyal customer and family friend, Teddy is known for telling long winded stories and invading Bob's personal space.. Teddy is something of a "sad-sack", he is a desperate, divorced and lonely individual with few social skills longing for companionship and a family of is own. Because of this he desperately wants to be part of the Belcher family and is often inserting himself into their personal lives. He frequents Bob's Burgers in order to have someone to talk to because he is lonely.
Teddy has many fears and anxieties, the greatest of which he claims to be costumed characters and their "soulless eyes," after an incident with his ex-wife. He also has a hot temper, and has been seen to fly off the handle (The Cook, the Steve, the Gayle, & Her Lover)(Uncle Teddy) in defense of those he loves, but always seems to express immediate regret. He sees a Therapist, Dr. Marjorie, for this and other concerns. According to Teddy "Dr. Marjorie says if I don't value my time, nobody else will" (Glued: Where's my Bob?)
Teddy will eat anything, and notoriously eats a sponge in "The Unnatural". Teddy eats a burger every day (Friends with Burger-fits) and is resultantly in poor health. Though occasional refrences are made throughout the series to Teddy's weight and health (Uncle Teddy)(The Deepening), it is the focus of the Season 5 episode "Friends with Burger-fits."
When the Belchers visit Teddy's house on Thanksgiving, they discover that though he doesn't have silverware, he compulsively hoards things that he finds throughout his daily life as a contractor and envisions fixing in his closet and dining room (Thanks-Hoarding). With the help of the Belchers, Teddy lets go of some things and learns about the root cause of his hoarding.
StoryIn The Belchies, Teddy tells Louise, Gene and Tina a story about the treasure under the abandoned Taffy Factory. Although there was gold, Teddy thought the story was really just a joke.
Teddy, for one episode, was enemies with Louise because he occupies her room during his stay at the bed and breakfast. When Louise finds out his phobia of costumed characters, she orders several over the telephone, which drives him out.
Teddy uses a McLecklin hammer, which he claims is "The Meryl Streep of hammers". He used it to destroy Bob's Fukinawa knife in The Millie-Churian Candidate and made a video of it hammering nails online.
Teddy's last name is unknown. It has been implied his last name begins with "J", in the conversation where he tells the kids they could call him T.J. (Uncle Teddy) In "The Gayle Tales", he is named Theodore the Blacksmith in Tina's Lady Chatterteeth's Lover essay, strongly implying that Teddy is a nickname for Theodore. In "Thelma & Louise Except Thelma is Linda", Teddy lies about having a wife and gives her name as Karen McGillicuddy, an implication that this may be his last name.
Teddy has a family history in town. One of his relatives owned a speak-easy named Swanky's, originator of the mixed drink "The Swanky Panky", and his uncle Paddy was a maid at Caffrey Taffy Company.
Teddy's parents fought throughout his childhood, often leaving him to feel responsible for "fixing" things or holding the family together (Thanks-Hoarding).
Teddy's mother, who is partially blind (Aquaticism), lives some distance away from him and flies in for visits. The two often travel together, taking a single's cruise in "Gayle Makin' Bob Sled" and a silent weekend retreat. Teddy remarks to Bob over the phone that he doesn't think his mother "respects herself" when it comes to men, and has an age-inappropriate boyfriend who Teddy and Dana exclusively call "Boy-Toy" as of Season 8.
Teddy's father is implied to be deceased as Teddy dedicated his cover of Natalie Merchant's wonder to him in "The Millie-churian Candidate." According to Teddy in "Bob Fires the Kids", before dying he was an alcoholic. Teddy had a bad relationship with his father "Father of the Bob", and clearly connects personally to the harsh lyrics of musical health inspector Tommy Jaronda's "Daddy", a song with lines like "Daddy, you are my enemy/ punches are not hugs to me.". Teddy's admitted favourite childhood memory is when his father high-fived him (Lorenzo's Oil? No, Linda's).
Francis is Teddy's guinea pig, who is tragically killed in "Full Bars." In the episode, Teddy is depicted as a loving and devoted, though misguided pet owner who spray paints the animal and lets her run freely around a crowded room. Teddy tells the Belchers that she goes by Fran or Fancie, but never Frankie, or as Linda suggests "Francie-Pants." Upon her death he becomes hysterical and holds an aggressively mandatory funeral at his halloween party.
Teddy is constantly in search for (usually unsuccessfully) for love. In "My Fuzzy Valentine " he attends speed dating at the restaurant as set up by Linda. He eventually gets Gina's phone number, another participant in the speed dating. In "I Get Psy-chic Out of You," Linda gives Teddy a vision that he is to meet a woman in a yellow dress and he'll find a nickel. Later in the episode he phones her asking if the dress has to be yellow as he has found a woman wearing a vest with a yellow floral pattern. During the credits he is seen dancing with the woman.
In "The Silence of the Louise," he starts a professional relationship with Janine, the owner and operator of Yours Truly Stationery, making inspirational posters, but checks more than once to see if she might want it to become romantic. Teddy even claims to have gotten to 3rd base with his 2nd cousin.
Teddy was once married to Denise, but they divorced after she left him for someone who was into boats. Following their divorce, Teddy spent years fixing up a boat which he christens Sea Me Now to try and impress her, crashes infront of her, and finally explodes with a flare gun. In "Bed and Breakfast," Teddy reveals that they once had a three way, or at least he watched his her have sex with Ray, a man who dresses as a seal down at the amusement park. During their marriage, Denise even made Teddy go to the bathroom in the yard.
In "Housetrap" Teddy reveals a crush on a rich widow / employer named Helen. He enjoys spending time sitting on the porch drinking tea with her "for what feels like minutes" and thinks she might reciprocate his feelings.
When Helen reappears in "The Helen Hunt", she is much less interested in Teddy than her first appearance, and appears to be using him. Though Linda spends the entire episode trying to get the two together, Helen leaves quickly without saying goodbye after casually putting Teddy in danger.
in "Bobby Driver" Teddy talks to Linda about going on a second date with Caroline, who likes sushi. Teddy claimed to also like sushi, but doesn't really.
Teddy's best friend is Bob , who Teddy is deeply devoted to, at times he is even shown to idolize Bob and his family. This likely because teddy himself desperately wishes for a family of his own. He is often shown to waver between wanting to be friends with Bob, and wanting to BE Bob, he frequently makes comments of "watching over Linda & the kids" if something happens to Bob. When the Belcher kids leave their bikes in Teddy's garage, he pretends he is father to 3 children of his own (Bob Fires the Kids).
Teddy is in his own words the "fun uncle" to the Belcher kids (Uncle Teddy), but according to Louise, he's the "Dangerous uncle we never had" (The Secret Ceramics Room of Secrets), as he supplies the kids with the tools they need to pull off crazy schemes in episodes like "The Quirkducers" and "Ain't Miss Debatin'."
As a main character, Teddy has appeared in all but a handful of episodes, the episodes in which Teddy has NOT appeared in are listed below;
Teddy appears in every episode in season 2.
- Mutiny on the Windbreaker
- An Indecent Thanksgiving Proposal
- Tina-Rannosaurus Wrecks
- Two for Tina
- It Snakes a Village
- The Kids Run the Restaurant
- Boyz 4 Now
- There's No Business Like Mr. Business Business
- The Laser-inth
- Mom, Lies, and Videotape
- Into the Mild
- I Bob Your Pardon
- Bed, Bob & Beyond
- If You Love It So Much, Why Don't You Marionette?
- Yes Without My Zeke
- "Don't feed a guy a sponge, Bobby!"
- "Do not come in here! Nobody come in here! Someone threw up in the bounce house. Kids, kids, kids you can't go into the bounce house, someone threw up in there. I don't know....I don't know what happened. Who wants to dance?"
- 'My temporary house, my temporary rules! You don't like it? There's the door that you can't go out of!'
- 'No, Gene. Kurt is seducing your Mommy.'
- 'No, that was my second cousin, and it was third base.'
- 'I made this guy say yes with my body!'
- Bobby, want to come over and watch the game tonight? I'm making a three-bean salad, but it's bring your own bean. Can I put you down for garbanzo?
- 'It's a butt! Get it? A butt! With three turds!
- "Gretchen's sister is skinny, Lin, but it's because she's on meth amphetamines."
- "We'll be doing many things this weekend like dinner, rough housing but not too rough, brushing teeth, and going to bed."
- "There's a clog in there, and it could be underwear, what will it find? Goop? Probably goop."
- "I can fix it!"
- "When I come back in here tomorrow there better be a frigging burger on that board!"
- "Thank you guys for helping me with my stuff. and putting up with my stuff. and making stuffing."
- "What is succotash anyway, Bobby? I know, but Mort was wondering."
- "Is my ass on fire? Be honest."
- Main article: Teddy/Gallery
- Makes his own home brewed beer (Speakeasy Rider).
- Is left handed in "Sacred Cow" and "Christmas in the Car", but is right handed in "Uncle Teddy".
- Is allergic to peanuts (Adventures In Chinchilla-Sitting).
- Drives a green pickup truck with a cream stripe running long it. It appears to be a 1971 Ford F-Series.
- Only has one testicle (Lindapendent Woman)
- Favorite color is yellow. (I Get Psy-chic Out of You).
- Once played Blake in a production of Glengarry Glen Ross.
- Gets intense B.O. when he's nervous, which he calls "panic sweats" (Thanks-hoarding)
- Appears to be religious as he has intentions to watch church on TV in "Christmas in the Car " and has intentions to attend midnight mass in "Father of the Bob ".
- Despite not being Jewish, Teddy plays on a Jewish ice hockey team called The Mighty Schmucks, meaning Teddy plays hockey.
- In "Turkey in a Can", he mentions that his father potty trained him when he was seven and finally learned when he was fourteen.
- Favorite member of Boyz4Now is Allen.
- Favorite movie is The Dark Crystal
- Has had the same cell phone for over ten years, which currently only charges up to 23% (The Gene Mile).
- Though it's slightly hard to hear it in his voice, Teddy as a Brooklyn accent.
- Linda said in Something Old, Something New, Something Bob Caters for You that she and Bob dated for several years before they got married in 1991, according to Gene and Louise's stories in Sliding Bobs, Teddy was still attractive when Bob and Linda met, this means Teddy starred in The Deepening 3D and started gaining weight in the late 1980's.