| “ | In the game of okay or not okay, I am not okay! | ” |
"Vampire Disco Death Dance" is the twenty-second episode in Season 11, being the two-hundred-and-sixteenth episode overall.
Plot[]
After Tina and Bob plan a father-daughter date to see Bob's favorite old campy vampire-sing-along movie, Tina decides to invite her group of friends along, as well. Meanwhile, Linda opens a restaurant for the raccoons in their alley.
Full story[]
The kids return to the restaurant from school, while Linda And Bob note that it was slow that day. Bob tells Tina that thanks to the slow day, he had time to work on their costumes for their father-daughter viewing of Vampire Disco Death Dance the next night (actually it was mostly Linda’s work). Louise laments that it is not fair that she and Gene cannot go see a vampire movie, but Bob says it is more; it is a dress-up sing-along interactive experience with an audience, including talking back to the screen and everyone throwing confetti at one point. But they also cannot see it as it’s rated-R, but not for violence like Louise hopes, being more campy and without blood. Louise loses interest at hearing this.
Bob goes into further detail: the film is about an 18-year-old farmer named Kevin who works on his mean father’s garlic farm but really wants to go to a disco nightclub, and ends up doing so, at a nightclub run by vampires. This is where he meets Destiny Fanger, whom Tina will be dressing up as, with Linda showing off a homemade sequined jumpsuit. Gene wants to see the movie, and Bob tells him they can when he’s 13, like Bob saw it when he was 13. Gene and Louise are turned off by how old the film actually is, while Bob thinks Tina is excited. But Tina is focusing more on drinking hard from a straw in a cup, and Bob asks her why she is doing that. Tina explains that some kids at school have been playing a new made-up game called "drinking or not drinking", whereby the players put straw in their mouths and the others have to guess if they are drinking or not drinking. She frustratedly admits that it is a dumb game after Linda notes it is not fun, but the kids she is hanging out with are her only shot at a peer group, so she is trying to make the best of it. But her drinking faces just look to her siblings that she is holding in a fat/stroke, so Bob suggests that the movie will be a break from her terrible group.
The next day at school, Tina is sitting at lunch with Tammy, Jocelyn, Jimmy Jr. and Zeke, all playing drinking-or-not-drinking, with herself trying to hide her disinterest and the others gleeful at playing.
At the restaurant, Bob finds that someone dumped a bunch of trash in the spot by their dumpster in the alley the previous night. Included are a small table and some baby chairs which Linda finds adorable but moldy. Bob laments that he has to put it all in the dumpster or it won’t be taken. Linda helps him, but he notes that it will be a tight fit, otherwise the raccoons will get in and rip open the trash bags. Linda takes offense at not being allowed to have "fun", and Bob notes that he knows she thinks they are her friends, but they do make a mess. Linda asks what if the raccoons could eat at the little moldy table like a little "raccoon restaurant", but Bob shoots down the idea before being boosted into the dumpster by her.
In the Wagstaff hall, Tammy stops the gourd walking by suggesting drinking-or-not-drinking that night, but Tina tries to get out of it by saying she has plans to see the movie with her dad. She explains how it is a musical with vampires and people talking back to the screen (with Jocelyn thinking the screen can hear them), and it is rated R, which gets the other’s attention.
In the alley, Bob and Linda stomp down on the trash to make it fit when the kids come out of the restaurant. Bob assures Tina that he will shower before the movie, but she reveals that the other kids are coming along to the movie as well, instead of just playing the straw game, as she is excited they will start liking the same things she does and she will not need any new friends. She thanks him and tells he will pick up and rive everyone before going back inside. Bob however is upset.
Later that night in the family bathroom, Bob is in costume as a vampire victim (with fake bite marks on his neck and dark makeup around the eyes) is putting makeup and pencil on Tina’s face and eyebrows while the others watch. Tina asks Bob if he is okay with her friends coming along, which he hesitantly says he is while Louise and Gene note subtly how obnoxious Tina’s friends are. Louise asks who Bob is to be, and he says he is "Nightclub Guy Number Three", who in the film yells "Dis-go to hell, vampires" right before dying. Bob finishes Tina’s eyebrows, and Linda tells them to go while denying she will do anything with the raccoons in the alley, to Bob’s confusion before he decides they should just go. Gene then tells Linda and Louise to leave as well, as he was already on the toilet when everyone came in to talk.
In the car, Bob drives Tina and the other kids to the theater. Jimmy Jr. is confused why Tina is in costume and he and Tammy thinks she is a goth now, before she reminds them that she said it was a dress-up singalong event, but none of them remember. Zeke asks what Bob is and innocently insults his costume as an "old-ass Burt Reynolds", while Jimmy tells him about the red light ahead that Bob can see because he thought Bob looked sleepy. Tammy says they should yell something at the car next to them when they stop, despite Bob telling them not to, and Jocelyn yells at a driver that she likes his shirt. Bob refuses to speed off when the kids tell him to as it is a red light, while barely holding in his frustration at the kid’s behavior.
At the apartment, Linda and the kids have set up the little chairs and table in the alley after taking them out of the trash, and Linda begins cooking spaghetti for the raccoons. Louise is incredulous that they are opening a restaurant for raccoons and giving hem real food as Bob said he doesn’t want them to eat their trash, while Linda is utterly serious. Linda lays out the plan: they will leave the food on plates on the table, and hide behind the dumpster to watch. There are three chairs, so hopefully there’s three raccoons; Louise is confused how they will sit in chairs while Linda insists that raccoons know how to sit in chairs. Gene will play jazzy music on his keyboard, and Louise will handle candles with matches, to her intrigue.
At the Top Hat movie theater, Bob walks the kids to the front door. Jimmy Jr. asks why he is there with them instead of staying in his car. Bob says that he’s coming in with them, and asks if they thought he just got dressed up to drop them off, which the other kids all answer yes to. Tina points out that they cannot get rid of him, as the film is still R-rated and as the adult, he has to accompany them. Inside the lobby, other theatre goers are dressed up, while Bob sees Dominic and greets him. Dominic at first thinks Bob is hanging out with the teens before Bob says he is chaperoning, and then admits to Bob that he hates having to clean up since people throw stuff around the theater. Bob apologizes for the mess that will be made. wants to grab some good seats but Zeke tells him they should get snacks first. Bob and Tina tell the others to get some snacks while the two of them get some good seats. Tina tries to be excited about them all liking it but accidentally embarrasses herself calling them the "kid crew".
In the theater, an emcee greets Bob and Tina, and the two get seats several rows from the screen, while a lady in a costume with spider web hair compliments Tina’s Destiny costume. Tina hopes the kids find them soon, when the lights go down and Bob is giddy about the film starting. The audience participation starts with everyone standing up during a camera moving fast and pretending to be dizzy, and thumping along with Kevin’s father in the movie nagging on a barn door, even people throwing garlic at the screen (which Bob says is a waste of garlic but still fun). Tina is happy watching the opening scene of Kevin and his father arguing about his disco dancing, but keeps looking at the door to see if the others will see them.
In the alley, Louise lights a match for the candles on the table, but only pouts it out when it starts to burn her fingers. Linda gives a small speech about her idea and now "Alley Rascals" is open for business, then calls over the raccoons as the three hide behind the dumpster.
In the theater, the movie has gotten to the scene in the night club where Kevin meets Destiny, but as Bob points out her character, Tina is too distracted looking for her friends at the door. As the audience sings along to Destiny’s “I’m All over You” number, Tina keeps looking, until the part where Kevin removes his overalls due to them smelling like garlic. But soon she leaves the theater to go check on them, while Bob is upset when he she is gone. In the lobby, she sees them all sitting on a staircase to the upper floor with fountain drinks in cups with straws. Zeke asks her where she’s been, and Tina says she’s been watching the movie before asking them what they are doing. They have been playing more drinking-or-not-drinking all this time, and Jocelyn asks her to join them. Tina notes that the movie already started, which Tammy dismisses saying "it’s okay if that old movie gets a little older". Tina reluctantly agrees to play using Jimmy Jr.’s drink, and groans as she sits down with them.
Bob continues to watch the film, but notices Tina is still not back yet. In the lobby, the kids continue to play the "game", when Tina suggests they could go back inside to see the movie, telling Jimmy Jr. that it has dancing and daddy-issue stuff, but he wonders how it can be cooler than drinking-or-not-drinking. Zeke says that the movie does sound cool and leads them back in.
In the alley, the raccoons Big Baby Pudding Snatcher, Little King Trashmouth and Gary are drawn to the tables and start eating the spaghetti ravenously, while Linda and the kids watch from afar.
In the theater, Jocelyn keeps whispering to Tammy asking if different characters are vampires and wondering if the movie is about vampires before Tina tells them to shush. Zeke and Jimmy Jr. talk and laugh about a deformed gummy bear from the snack bar, being loud enough to distract Bob, Tina and other moviegoers.
In the alley, the raccoons are almost finished when Big Baby Pudding Snatcher and Gary start fighting over some of the remaining spaghetti, with Trashmouth getting involved too, as Gene’s keyboard music does nothing to stop them.
In the theater, Jimmy Jr. starts a game of drinking-or-not-drinking with the others while Tina tells him to watch the movie, but they dismiss her. As they keep talking, Tina breaks and yells at them being annoying, saying she should not have invited them, thought they’d actually enjoy it. This gets everyone’s attention, as Tammy and the others hypocritically note she is being loud, but Tina continues to blow up about how she feels she is an idiot for thinking they could do something interesting together and bond over it. The emcee has Dominic stop the movie from the projector booth, and asks Tina if she is okay, as she is freaking out and ruining the movie for everyone. Tina says she is not okay, and storms out with Bob following her.
Bob and Tina sit on the staircase in the cinema lobby, with Tina lamenting having invited the other kids, while Bob notes that she just wanted to share something that she thought was cool, like he was trying to do with her. They both admit the kids ruined the movie, with Bob noting that they are awful while Tina laments about how they are inside watching the movie they don’t care about, and the two of them are out in the lobby. Tina asks if they can just go home without them, which Bob thinks would be pretty fun to leave them but notes he's legally not allowed to do. Bob asks Tina if she wants him to go in to get them so they can leave, understanding if she doesn’t want to go back in the theater due to her outburst, but Tina asks if they can jut sit there for a little bit. Bob agrees, and they sit together, with Bob holding her head to comfort her.
In the alley, the raccoons continue to fight, as Linda’s shouts do nothing and gene has nothing in his pockets to feed them. Linda laments that she just wanted to give the raccoons something nice, when Louise asks for the matches to light the table on fire in hopes the raccoons unite with them to put it out, but Linda has a better idea, one she knows Bob will disapprove of and they have to clean up before he gets home (which is not peeing in the alley to assert dominance, as Gene guesses). Linda opens the dumpster lid, feeling access to the trash, rather than the 'restaurant' will make them happy. The raccoons climb into the dumpster, stopping fighting and beginning to make a mess.
In the theater lobby, Bob tells Tina that the first time he went to see the movie, he was alone, as he thought no one else would like it, but remembers watching the movie, looking at all the people in costume singing together, and thinking he was with people who get him. He says he did, basically Linda, and not people he goes on adventures with as Tina asks, but he assures Tina that she will meet people like that and go on adventures and stay in touch; he really does think that, as he would want to be one of the people who would meet her. Tina thanks him as they hear the last song, 'Shake Your Love Parts" (where Destiny turns Kevin into a vampire so they can be together forever, while the other vampires take turns drinking from him) coming from the theater. Bob stands up and starts showing Tina the dance moves, albeit not very well due to his body aging. Tina joins and thanks him for taking her along, and guesses she will have to wait to meet whoever she meets next, and try to dance.
In the car ride home, Bob asks the other kids if they liked the movie, and while not liking the 1970s outfits, Jimmy Jr. says there were some cool dance moves in it, while Zeke liked a scene where bats flew in a guy’s face and then carried a disco ball around the whole city. Tina is surprised they didn’t hate it, with Tammy calling it "mostly dumb' but not "totally stupid". At a red light, another car pulls up and Jocelyn decides to yell at them again, but just yells that their car is blue before telling Bob to drive off.
Videos[]
References[]
External links[]
- "Vampire Disco Death Dance" press release via The Futon Critic
- "Vampire Disco Death Dance" on IMDb
- "Vampire Disco Death Dance" script via Springfield! Springfield!